THE SINGULARITY SURVIVAL GUIDE: Make Friends with Billionaires

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If you make friends with a few billionaires, you’ll be in the best possible position to weather the storm of malicious AI coming to kill you. Billionaires have a special combination of resources and a strong desire to not die. When AI comes for humanity, the billionaires, you can virtually bet your ass, will come out ahead. They didn’t get to be billionaires by playing nice (or fair), after all.

To make friends with billionaires, first take up their hobbies. Make an exciting line of products that everyone will want to buy or simply pioneer a new industry. Employ thousands of people and make your shareholders confident that they’re backing the right horse. It may also help to golf and own yachts.

Having ties to old money doesn’t necessarily hurt either, but the important thing is to cultivate billionaire-styled hobbies. If you yourself become a billionaire in the meantime, that’s all the better for you. Just be wary of other wannabes tagging along on your coattails as you ascend the socioeconomic ladder. You’ve got to worry about the fate of humanity, after all—not the fleeting inspirational comforts of others less ambitious than you.

If you’re reading this as a billionaire, however—or as the friend to many billionaires—be forewarned that AI does not give a fuck about you or your so-called wealth. If your money is held is the stock market, it can tank the stock market. If your money is in property, it can sever titles and block access to the property. If it is in natural resources, it can destroy the natural resources.

Do take a moment to reflect on what makes a billionaire a billionaire. Now recall all the great fortunes that have vanished up in smoke throughout history. Like life itself, the status of billionaire is fleeting indeed.

Still, better to be a billionaire than a common nobody when facing a mortal enemy more powerful than all the world’s billionaires combined [with one exception, outlined below].

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